As for real world practice, I have used it passively and primarily through listening coupled with what is called the “walk-in” method to understand people as I travel around the world. It has served me well as a manager with global responsibility.

[James’ Reply: Thank you Mark!] 

In doing as you described without preamble you’ve placed yourself in a pronounced “one up” position in transactional analysis terms. If you engage in a conversation they’re not expecting you are well off script in “Presentation of Everyday Live” (Goffman) terms. They don’t know what game they are in. The game immediately available to explain the experience they are having is not a happy one.

I learn at least as much while trying to explain myself to others as I do questioning their reasoning. The stuff I learn when I let them drive tends to be a bit more startling to me, and thus rewarding.

[James’ Reply: The whole point of transpective dialog is to learn from what happens in someone else’s head. That is impaired if I inject my own ideas into their thinking. Certainly there is a different way of learning from people, I guess it would be called ordinary dialog, that involves both sides contributing ideas to a community thought process. That’s great, too. I do that. I also do transpection. I find myself doing transpection a lot.

As I think more about it, I think my preference for transpection is connected with critical thinking. Transpection is a tool for self-criticism. 

I agree that unannounced transpection can cause trouble, but not because I’m in a one-up situation. You might just as well say I’m in a one-down situation, since I am giving priority to the other persons ideas. It causes trouble in cases where people begin to suspect they are being manipulated or used– when they suspect they are one-down.

That’s why I have found it useful to distinguish between shallow and deep transpection, and then to let people know what game I’m inviting them to play, when I’m going to play hard.] 

[James’ Reply: Well, it was one of my half-jokes: it seems absurd, but isn’t. Try googling for the phrases “tortuous pleasure” or “tortured pleasure” or consider the positive connotations of the word “tease” as in striptease; and see Webster’s definition #2 for interrogate “to give or send out a signal to (as a transponder) for triggering an appropriate response”.]

That aside, as another person who has gone through this process with you, aside from the eventual learning of what you learned in the process, I find the greatest benefit to me personally is that it forces me to slow down and try to become more cognizant of WHY I am doing WHAT I am doing at any given time. My struggle to answer your questions reveals to me strengths and weaknesses in my motivation, if not also in my actions. It is a very valuable, and for me, enjoyable, process.

[James’ Reply: As I recall, I gave you a briefing when we started working that my method was to ask a lot of questions and that some of my questions might sound strange or annoyed, but that I hoped you would not assume that I was annoyed. Then again, the thing about you, David, is you are one tough and confident fellow. You’re like a junkyard dog. It’s more of a problem when I’m dealing with greener or otherwise more fragile people.]

Whenever I interact with you, I am aware that I should be looking for the learning that are straight forward and those that are hidden. It is kind of you to explain the transpection process and seek permission, since it makes me more conscious to look at more hidden learning than I am able to find, whenever I feel I am being stressed.

With such a mindset, I am happy whenever I am stressed since I know there is a treasure nearby. Also as your student, it makes me think that there need not necessarily be a treasure nearby