Comments on: Collegiality

By: Ulhas Deshmukh

Ulhas Deshmukh — Thu, 06 Dec 2007 04:49:33 +0000

Hi,

Nice post, but i want to know about which way (A,B or C) I should go if i have conflict with colleague seat next to me and
who is also s/w tester.
I have used way A.
what you suggest?

[James’ Reply: Just for you, I posted my advice for that as a full blog post by itself…]

By: Danny Faught

Danny Faught — Wed, 05 Dec 2007 20:40:14 +0000

Hi, James, thanks for sharing this. I’ve picked up the phone several times when tensions start to get heated, and though people seem to be surprised to hear their phone ring, it’s usually a much better medium for resolving conflict. In fact, I’m reminded of a recent interaction that I should really follow up with a phone call…

Oddly enough, there have been a few cases where I’ve stopped a phone or face-to-face conversation and reverted to email, where I had time to organize and edit my message.

[James’ Reply: At least twice, a voice conversation with you (I think both times you probably were the initiator) has helped me overcome a problem I’ve had with you. So, folks, Danny really does walk the talk of talking.]

By: Yan

Yan — Tue, 04 Dec 2007 22:26:57 +0000

Sometimes we should focus less on how correct we are, and focus more on how effective we can be. If you are right but no one listens to you, then you are not being effective at all, and you will get nothing done. Effective communication is the key to being productive (in a team environment or a community) in my book.

By: Jason

Jason — Tue, 04 Dec 2007 21:20:18 +0000

http://blogs.dovetailsoftware.com/blogs/jason_darling/archive/2007/12/04/drop-your-ego-lose-your-pride-and-open-your-arms.aspx

By: Chris Morris

Chris Morris — Mon, 03 Dec 2007 19:22:18 +0000

Thanks for sharing that, I think it’s an important point for all forms of communication and interaction. Tech is great for aiding/increasing communication, but it definitely has its limitations that can be detrimental to the process if not worked around.

By: CDriK

CDriK — Mon, 03 Dec 2007 15:52:26 +0000

Nice post !

By: David Christiansen

David Christiansen — Mon, 03 Dec 2007 12:47:39 +0000

I’m glad to hear stories like this. It is good for the industry as a whole when this type of maturity is displayed.

I have a few simple rules that I (try) to use to encourage collegiality in the discussions I get involved in. They may or may not be helpful to others, but I thought I’d share them and let you decide.
1) Know the difference between different and better.
2) Anyone who can contribute is allowed to.
3) Be title-blind.
4) Have thick skin, shed no tears, and bear no grudges.

Ironically, we sometimes debate the most when it matters the least, which is the reason for rule #1. There is not always a distinct advantage to one approach over an another, but our biases for repeating ourselves sometimes make us hold on to what we know a little too tightly. Being able to recognize that something is different but not better is a critical skill in being collegial.

This was a good post for a Monday morning James. It’s an encouraging way to start a week. Thanks!